Or, “Why Eating Salad Makes You Better Than Everyone Else.”
Day 14: Doesn’t thinking “half-way thru” pretty much always make you want to quit? Also, I can no longer do math.
Day 15: Starting to suspect that I am, in fact, evolving into a superior life form. I’m leaner, I have more energy, I can see some muscles, and I really enjoy telling people about it. I’m trying to decide what to call my new species. Friends have suggested “really annoying douchebag”, but that seems long to me. I’m thinking CrossFit.
Day 16: I haven’t been sleeping well. After a quick internet search where I checked Instagram 15 times in a row because I kept forgetting that’s not why I got online, I discovered my suspicion is very likely correct. I’m not eating enough. My lizard brain thinks we’re starving, so it is telling me to stay awake and forage for nuts and berries or hunt down small nocturnal animals. While that sounds like a good idea, I have to check Instagram 37 more times before I go to bed.
Day 17: Almost too much energy. Possibly my Golgi Body is confused and stopped making plant sugar and began making caffeine.
Day 18: Not sleepy. Not sleepy. Not sleepy.
Day 19: I’ve started saying words like “lifestyle” and “mindset”. My new species may not survive because no one will want to procreate with it
Day 20: I basically eat the same thing every day. Salad. Salmon. Sparkle water. I’m totally writing a diet book and calling it the “3S Diet!”. I’m going to be rich! *Husband just reminded me I’m on the “21 Day Sugar Detox”, which is technically already a diet.*
Day 21: Diet complete. I lost 4 lbs but it looks like more. Hello collarbone!
Was it worth it? Yes. Did I cheat? Yes. (I had 1/2 a cookie and a Nutella macaron.) Would I do it again? I kind of still am. Limiting sugar is a good idea for me. I felt like I was too dependent on it before. But I will never pass up a macaron from 2Tarts in New Braunfels, TX. I may be a whole new species, but I’m not a monster.